*heavy sigh* I feel like I am stagnating a little in MALT.  Probably it's because I don't feel that I have done anything productive in a week or so.  Sure, I am doing the reading, attending and contributing in the hangouts, and doing a lot of thinking - but I don't feel that I have built anything in a while.  I have mentioned in a number of posts elsewhere how much of a builder I am. . . not happy unless something constructive results from my efforts.   Being stagnant is a feeling I have to get past.  I guess I need to recognize that I AM building something. . .  I am building my knowledge base. . . expanding my brain. . .  even thinking is constructive (well. . . most of it is)

I'm off to build something!

Kind of a tough week professionally last week.  I lost three people.  One due to a resignation, one termination and one layoff.  When you only have about 20 staff, losing three in one week is a lot.

I'm off to Rockville MD for a few days of fun by the seashore. . . NOT(T).  Actually, it's budget meetings that I am attending at our campus next year.  We will set targets for all the benchmarks we will try to hit next year.  We are doing really well so far this year so I imagine next year to be a lot tougher . . . .

A milestone over the weekend.  We finished the Summer term for MALT 16.  On to Fall.  Don't know how I did yet but I know I could have done better.  An earlier post about drowning kind of sums up my experience so far.  That will change I know.  Really like this cadre of folks that I am working with.

I am sure this will change. . . I know it will change. . .  but I feel a little like I am standing in an enormouos  seven-foot deep pool.  I can bounce on the bottom so that my head rises above the surface now and again and suck in a lungful of air but my head soon goes under and the (slight) panic sets in.  I can tread water and breathe normally but only for short periods. 

I am sure that I would have drowned before now were it not for my cadre-mates.  They make me realize that I am not alone and not the only one.  Last night we played League of Legends for a couple of hours and , even though I am a self-professed non-gamer (some might even say gameaphobic) I was surprised how quickly I was able to pick up the technique and goals of the game. 

So, one small step, or perhaps I should say one small breath.  Perhaps it's me, or perhaps the pool is getting shallower, whichever may be, I am breathing more frequently now and I think I may continue to do so.

One of my early photography professors Joe Gonda was, I believe, from Czechoslovakia.  He had a pretty thick accent as well as a very interesting way of looking at the world.  Not sure what he did there but one of his positions before coming to teaching was with the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.  An amazing guy and a great teacher.  One day he was critiquing one of my photo assignments and said "it looks like organized disorder."  He went on to say that there were too many "things" in the picture. . . but that everything was "composed nicely."

Three or so weeks into the MALT program, and only one synchronous session under my belt and that's the way I feel right now.  Organized disorder.  There are, it feels like, too many "things" coming at me (us?) at once.  A myriad of tools, websites, assignments, elements and other things to keep straight and not lose track of.   And really. . .  it's not even begun!

I tallied only the websites used so far in class and came up with the following list:

1. Wavenet
2. Sakai Cog Tools
3. Sakai Action Research
4. Sakai Learning Design
5. Center for Collaborative Action Research
6. MindMaps
7. Weebly
8. Weebly blog
9. Weebly gaming blog:
10. Pepperdine Gmail
11. Personal Gmail
12. Google+
13. Edmodo
14. And quite a few that I didn't list.

Well, it's the last day of Cadre Camp for MALT 16.  What a ride!  Over the last five days there has been much laughter, a few tears, camaraderie, new friendships formed, old friendships renewed, and a LOT of learning.  Speaking for myself, this was largely about learning more about me..  

I know that I came into this with no small amount of trepidation.  Am I smart enough to do this?  Am I too old?  CAN I actually do it?  While not totally absent now, these fears have largely taken a back seat.  As of right now. . .  Saturday morning. . . I think - THINK mind you - that I can do this.  

The people I have met and bonded with are nothing short of extraordinary.  Sure we each have our foibles - that's human nature - but I can see each of us fitting uniquely together and forming a cohesive and highly productive . . . well . . .  cadre.